Toky On Becoming A Young Mother, Blogging And Her Foundation, Aye
By Laci McKinney
“Plans derailed by a choice that changed my life forever. A blessing received that gave me a new meaning to life.”
Toky never even imagined that she would become a mother at 20 years old. But as she puts it, God had other plans for her. And, it’s quite obvious that he did. Her daughter Ava has changed Toky’s life for the better.
Those around her, who knew her become she added “mommy” to her name, can testify to the woman that Toky is becoming every day. But, Ava changed Toky’s life in more ways than one. Read more to learn how having a daughter at a young age inspired Toky.
At 20 years of age, did you ever think you would become a mother?
At the age of 20, I never thought I would be pregnant. The thought never even crossed my mind, even when people would tell me that they were pregnant, I still wouldn’t even think about what if I was pregnant – that is how much it was of less concern to me. But, God had other plans for me.
But, God had other plans for me.
How did your life change once you had your daughter, Ava?
I get asked this question a whole lot, and my answer always stays the same. If you knew the young lady I was back then you would be able to see the change. Having Ava changed me as a person and as a lady in this world. She made me view life differently. She gave me a sense of ambition, not that I am saying I was never ambitious but it made me hungry to be somebody and do more with my life.
It just made me become a woman who had a voice and who knew how to use it. Like I always say, “Once you have a voice and a sense of why you were created you are untouchable.”
She also made me know who God really was and not fake it.
“Once you have a voice and a sense of why you were created you are untouchable.”
What advice would you give to a young mother that has given up on her dreams?
Young Mothers out there, the worst thing you can do is give up your dreams, because you will regret it always and you’ll also blame your child for it. Never ever lose faith in you, and know that just because you have a child doesn’t mean you cannot achieve your goals it just means you are working twice as hard for it.
Do not make excuses for yourself, instead motivate yourself and be a role model for your child. At the end of the day, keep your head up and believe in the power you have to be great.
How has blogging about your journey helped you grow?
I was so scared about blogging, mainly because I didn’t want to open up to people. I was scared of being judged. It wasn’t until my loving mother told me everyone is scared of something, but it doesn’t matter as long as you don’t let it define you. She encouraged me to go for it and share my story or what I am going through, because I never know who I might help just by them reading my story. And it is so crazy because I get so many emails about people being touched by my story and me being brave enough to share my story, and it makes me feel like I am actually doing something good.
What was your inspiration behind starting the “AYE FOUNDATION”? How can we donate to the cause?
I started AYE FOUNDATION mainly because I know how lucky I am to have people who help me out from time to time. Some young mothers out there have no one to help them at all, so why can’t I help out the best way I can. I also want my daughter Ava to understand that people go through different situations and she should be grateful for her situations and most importantly never looked down on anybody no matter what.
So every month, she will be the one to pick out the winner. For last month, we put each name on a piece of paper and then put it in a hat and she literally picked one.
Want to keep up with Toky? Follow her on Instagram @tokkiieee or her website www.diaryofayoungmom.com.